Can’t Hack It with Social Media

And it’s because I can’t handle digital socializing. A few weeks ago, I had nearly 30 messages I had to reply or react to (and I’m not even getting paid). Because of the stuff I post, I end up getting private messages, which is fine, but also sometimes not fine. There are times I want to reply, “Neither of us are going to get anything out of this, so let’s pretend this never happened.” So, it’s my fault in a sense for inviting conversation and therefore, I’m going to make it much much harder for anyone to contact me. If you have a problem with anything on this site, you’ll have to talk to me in person and look into my beady little eyes.

Anyway, I admit the defect is mine. The part of my brain that is supposed to come up with chatty online small talk is like a dented, rotted potato covered with gnats. Other people have vibrant, healthy social gourds in their heads. Wet gourds filled with little sayings. So, if you ask them how they’re doing, they have a trademark saying they can pop-off with. “Just dandy!” and you know they’re lying but as a society, we all know we’re just saying this to be saying stuff and none of it matters. But if someone asks me how I’m doing, my brain has everything divided up into little compartments: eternally, doing great; health-wise, eh; kids, good; knees, bad, etc. So I just say, “Good” because we’re all just saying stuff and none of it matters. But a little part of me feels like I’m betraying myself by playing along. I’d much rather say, “I have a sharp pain in my bowels, but my house is nice and tidy. Would you care to know more? Or are you just saying this to be saying stuff and none of it matters?”

Point: me bad at type-y to people. Me hates it.

I’m going to post whatever I want, by the way. There’s no “theme” to this site. It’s not going to be all thoughtful reflections, for example. If that were the case, there’d be like two posts a year. I’m going to post whatever comes into my head and if you don’t get it or think it’s weird, please just leave it alone. Don’t ask me about it. I’ve had several people come up to me and ask about something I posted and, I’m not exaggerating, 90% of the time I have no idea what they’re talking about. Maybe I should see a doctor, take some ginkgo.

I guess the conclusion or point to all this is, I like to make stuff. Lots of stuff. I like to write and draw and take bad photos. I also like to share these things and I hope they make people happy (I’m like Kermit the Frog). But I don’t want to hear about it. I mean, I like to hear about it once in awhile, like twice a month maybe. How’s that sound? Twice a month, two people can say something? You guys can get together and work that out. I can guarantee you that my mind potato can handle two remarks.

Anywho, no more social media. Only media. Putting the “me” back into media.